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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26588602">Bad For Your Health</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/HolyMakkirel/pseuds/HolyMakkirel'>HolyMakkirel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fate/Grand Order</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Existential Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Not Canon Compliant, Smoking</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:09:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,747</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26588602</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/HolyMakkirel/pseuds/HolyMakkirel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Waver is not adjusting well to his new life. Zhuge Liang, Pseudoservants, Chaldea - he really, really wants to pretend none of that stuff has anything to do with him. Unfortuantely, his Master isn't on board with that idea.</p><p>Written for cakensteinlabs! The Master in this story isn't quite the blank protagonist shown in the game, but rather her own sona and take on the character!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Fujimaru Ritsuka &amp; Waver Velvet, but she's master of chaldea sooo, ish. it's not really romantic at all, it's also my friend's sona rather than gudako, it's just some master/servant bonding baby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Bad For Your Health</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/cakensteinlabs/gifts">cakensteinlabs</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Click. Burn. Inhale. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Keep inhaling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kind of a long inhale, actually.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pause for thought. Hold it in; the smoke, not the thought. The thought too, actually.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Exhale.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the routine Waver Velvet had grown used to since his arrival in Chaldea. Assuming he </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> Waver Velvet, a fact he wasn’t entirely sure of one way or another. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Pseudoservant.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> It was a term he hadn’t encountered before the upheaval that brought him here, and one that brought him no shortage of things to consider. No sooner had he gotten used to life as </span>
  <em>
    <span>Lord El-Melloi II</span>
  </em>
  <span> that he was thrust into the position of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Zhuge Liang,</span>
  </em>
  <span> and thrust out of it just as quickly. He knew that he wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>himself,</span>
  </em>
  <span> per se, but he… felt like himself? By all means, he was just here now, with a slew of powers he never had before coming, alike in every other way to the man who taught classes at Clock Tower. Yet, could it really be so simple? Ishtar had passed him countless times in the hall, looking no different than the Tohsaka girl who’d passed him the same way at the academy, apart from an outfit change. Who was to say Zhuge Liang himself wasn’t hiding away, somewhere deep within him, or worse, </span>
  <em>
    <span>already</span>
  </em>
  <span> right there in his mind without him realizing it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The physical changes didn’t help. The human body doesn’t just shoot back a decade out of nowhere, but he supposed he wasn’t quite </span>
  <em>
    <span>human</span>
  </em>
  <span> anymore, was he? And if he wasn’t human, then he was servant, and the servant summoned was Zhuge Liang, so he was Zhuge Liang, not Waver Velvet, and so who was this consciousness piloting this body and insisting that it </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> Waver Ve-</span>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Ouch</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>.</span>
  </em>
  <span> In his absent minded consideration, his hand made its way above his head, laying back against the wall. The cigarette in his hand, forgotten by his lips, had unfortunately not forgotten to burn. The ash had gotten too long and heavy, fell down to land behind his ear in a show of bad luck, and singed him for the moment it took to yell and bat it away. He cursed his lungs, reversed to the state before they’d adjusted to cigarettes, failing to keep up with his mind no less compelled to light one up when stressed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then there was a knock at the door. He didn’t get to answer before he heard it open, though, as the master of Chaldea herself barged in. </span>
  <b>
    <em>“Waver!” </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <span>He groaned. “Master.” Reaching into the ashtray beside him, he put down the cigarette as he contemplated how annoying it was to hear his voice a decade younger again. “Did you n-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>told</span>
  </em>
  <span> you that you need to spend more time with the rest of us!” She was clearly not here just to ask him for help on a mission, and she emphasized that by picking up his cigarette and putting it out herself. “You can’t just keep sitting around in your room, brooding and smoking all day. Didn’t you promise that you’d start eating in the mess hall?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waver looked to the plate on his desk. And the one stacked below it. And the few others in the pile, and the cutlery piled neatly on top. A monument to how much he didn’t want to integrate with Chaldea, a tally of how many meals he’d eat in his room without even stepping out for long enough to take his plates back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did I?..” He tried to sound genuinely forgetful.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You did.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” She made it clear that she hadn’t forgotten anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I… look, Master. I have nothing against you. I understand this summoning system, and I understand that you’ve summoned a very powerful servant, and I don’t want to deny you that power. I’m going to fight alongside you as long as I must, but still, I don’t really feel a need to plant my roots here… I don’t intend to stic-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In a moment, the girl’s shadow cast over him, blocking out the light with her form despite her diminutive stature. She stood between him and it, glaring down, hands on her hips. Sensing confrontation, he began to stand, only to realize that she wasn’t even </span>
  <em>
    <span>stepping back</span>
  </em>
  <span>, let alone showing any sign of feeling threatened. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Waver </span>
  <em>
    <span>Velvet!”</span>
  </em>
  <span> She started with a tone that was somehow even less pleasant than the one she had coming in. “I thought I’d made it clear by now that I’m not keeping you around here because you’re such an indispensably powerful servant!” Poking forward a finger, she tapped against his chest. “You’ve been summoned to Chaldea as a pseudoservant, and honestly, we have </span>
  <em>
    <span>no clue</span>
  </em>
  <span> what would happen if we tried sending you back. You’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>here.</span>
  </em>
  <span> You’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>stuck </span>
  </em>
  <span>here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waver opened his mouth, as if to interject, before realizing that the master’s expression had shifted to something far less angry, though no less unhappy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> have been busting my ass, doing damn near </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> in my power to make that better for you. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> it sucks that you’re here. You had a life, and as far as you’re concerned, you’ve been dragged away from it, and that’s terrible - I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know!</span>
  </em>
  <span> But we </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> do anything more than make your time here suck </span>
  <em>
    <span>less. </span>
  </em>
  <span>And the least you can do after </span>
  <em>
    <span>weeks</span>
  </em>
  <span> of trying your hardest to pretend this is all a bad dream is at least come along with us when we try to help you get situated!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though he’d followed along with her at times, Waver </span>
  <em>
    <span>tch</span>
  </em>
  <span>ed at the end of her little speech. “Respectfully, </span>
  <em>
    <span>master,</span>
  </em>
  <span> I don’t think you understand my position. I had a job, debts, responsibilities, people who depended on me - and I have </span>
  <em>
    <span>no idea </span>
  </em>
  <span>what’s happening back home. Am I gone? Am I there? Am I some clone of a man left behind? You’ll have to excuse me if I don’t just forget all those questions because you offered me lunch.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And </span>
  <em>
    <span>why </span>
  </em>
  <span>not? Really, weren’t you a master yourself? You know as well as I do that a servant’s appearance has no effect on the version of them that lived-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> a servant!” With a youthful passion uncharacteristic of the man in his older years, Waver slammed a hand down against his bed. “Zhuge Liang is a servant, and I’m sure whatever happened with him, the version that earned servanthood is unaffected. But I - Waver Velvet, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>living</span>
  </em>
  <span> person - I’m just a professor who’s now </span>
  <em>
    <span>here</span>
  </em>
  <span> for some reason. Heaven only knows what kind of complications and nuance surround my Saint Graph-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And so </span>
  <em>
    <span>what!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Though enthusiasm wasn’t unexpected of her, her direct rejection of his concerns caught him off guard. “Waver… regardless of circumstance, you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>here.</span>
  </em>
  <span> You know that as well as I do. From the deepest part of my heart, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>wish</span>
  </em>
  <span> we could at least know what was going on back in the life you remember living - but we </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Her tone had gotten far more contemplative and somber by now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But… I… I can’t accept that, Master. Gray, Reines, my students - I had a </span>
  <em>
    <span>mission.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I had to take care of them, and to pay off my debts, and…” her tone had spread to him, now, and his voice was lower, matching hers. One would hardly guess they’d just come out of a shouting match. “I need to become stronger, like I promised him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Waver…” sitting down, she wrapped an arm around his side comfortably, sensing that he could use it thanks to the crestfallen gaze he was giving the floor. “I can’t promise you anything about your students, or anything else from your old life - I don’t have those answers. But </span>
  <em>
    <span>you…</span>
  </em>
  <span> you can become stronger here. Whatever you promised, whatever you think he needed from you, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>swear</span>
  </em>
  <span> that you can find it at Chaldea.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emotionally, he wanted to push back. To deny and reject, and he would - but physically, the hug was helping. “I’m not Waver Velvet, master. I mean, not fully. Definitely not in terms of my power. However strong I get, who’s to say it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> power? Who’s to say it wouldn’t just be something unearned, lucked into because another strong servant dragged me along for the ride?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anticlimactically, she began to snicker. Before he could interrogate her on what was so funny, her hand crept up his side and squeezed at his bicep. With a yelp of surprise, he felt the tension in the room disappear as he prepared to ask what’d gotten into her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Waver… whatever you’re getting strong for, we </span>
  <em>
    <span>both</span>
  </em>
  <span> know that’s not a physical strength thing.” Sitting up right, she teased him with a flick to the forehead. “Stop being so contrarian. Even if Zhuge Liang gives you the power to shoot lasers from your eyes, Waver Velvet’s strength - mental, personal, whatever strength you need for your </span>
  <em>
    <span>mission </span>
  </em>
  <span>- that’s yours.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once more, almost on impulse, he felt a need to push back, deny, and reject.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then he grinned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...yea, you’re right-” The moment he said that, she was already up on her feet, standing over him again with a hand ruffling his hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know I am-” No sooner had </span>
  <em>
    <span>she</span>
  </em>
  <span> started than he gripped her free hand in his, for once asserting himself against her and telling her to hold on for a moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span> become stronger here. But a Servant and Master need to work together, so… I’ll be a better, you know, </span>
  <em>
    <span>team player.</span>
  </em>
  <span> And then, uh… would you help me along with that, please?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rolling her eyes with a smile, she looked down at him endeared by his genuine request. “Come on, Waver. I’ve been trying all along.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yea, I guess you have, haven’t you.” Pulling out another cigarette, he lit it up, with far less pretense than his last one. “Alright, then, it’s a deal.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nodding happily, she grabbed his pack of cigarettes, pulling one out for herself. Holding it in her mouth, she leaned in towards him, ignoring the lighter he extended out to her; picking up on her motion, Waver furtively leaned in, letting her light the cigarette off the tip of his. After a gentle drag, she got up, turning back to him with a bubbly grin. “I’ll leave you to yourself, then. But just for today!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, Master!” Just before she stepped out into the hall, she heard him call after her one last time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Could you… save me a seat by you at dinner?”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>if you want to be updated on my fics as they come, you can follow me on twitter @nogoodtora!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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